Sunday, December 26, 2010

Some pics to celebrate the end of fucking christmas.

You know, I can't really complain about the holidays being annoying too much..I did leave NYC for a short time..but came back and went to see what A Very Mars Bar Christmas was like.a lot of people there..pretty mellow night. I don't shop at freaking Kmart or RiteAid much so I barely heard any christmas music..I went to cafe's to sit and write and talk to nutters that were NOT playing that crappy music..but i'm still glad it's over. Now to get through Puke Years Eve and I can look forward to spring again-only a million more weeks!

Here are some random pics..Someone at Jalopy Theater really likes Tom Waits I guess..I find him annoying really. Being into old timey music everyone assumes you love Tom Waits and Old Crow Medicine Show..Well I DON'T love them. At all! Only 1 or 2 Waits songs can I stomach..the only modern musician I honestly will go pay money to see is Aimee Mann which I do whenever she plays in NYC. Unless it's that christmas album she put out which I pretend does not exist!

Then a searched bathroom at the health clinic..what the hell does that mean? And some slabs of meat displayed at a deli with lovely words written on them with ketchup..Peta should be out there..that shit looked gross and the ketchup looked kinda like blood dripping..Plus, the guys working in there thought I was taking THEIR picture and kept hooting and hollering at me. Yes, hooting AND hollering both! I guess I had it going on that day..

Then the dump bucket..the Prik with crazy sauce..and last but not least the cutest rat ever! He was as big as my dumb mexican cat Delgado and was practically making love to the off that he was..I named him Moishe cause he looked Jewish..He had no fear of me whatsoever and I'm not freaked out by rats so we hung out for a while. He's a gemini who enjoys long walks on the beach and eating shit from the trash!

Tuesday, December 21, 2010

At the Bowery Open MIc..Lunar Eclipse Madness.

Went to the weekly NYC talent show at Bowery Poetry Club monday..I go to this quite often and will be there tomorrow as well for a bit for Reverend Jen's Anti-Slam night...It was a fun night..weirdness was all around the streets..for a Monday it was crowded at the bars. After 1am, most people were walking around looking up watching the lunar eclipse including me. I like this lame picture I took of it with my crappy camera-it looks like a fake bad backdrop.

Here's some pics of my friend Patrick Bucklew AKA Mangina whom I adore. He performs with his girl Lauren and later they howl and play keyboard as the moon slowly disappeared. He also had on one HUGE mangina that he made..and asked people to stick their finger in it..That thing could eat someone alive if it had teeth! Later I went to Mars Bar where everyone predicted a huge fatal tidal wave and I kept announcing we were all going to die..But I was in a good mood and was really happy about dying at Mars Bar with friends for some reason..Now I'm just hungover and watching Dexter and am quite glad we all survived.

Monday, December 20, 2010

I'm an atheist but here are some sassy x-mas crafts..

These are some DIY xmas ornaments and various crafts that my friend Daniella AKA Our Lady of Perpetual PMS makes and will be sells these crafts at Bowery Poetry Club at times. The boob balls are perfect to hang on your tree which you know you won't throw out until April anyway! She also uses soy sauce containers and small cigar boxes to make little xmas and Day of the Dead type shrines..You can order what you want made from her..she lives in the neighborhood and you will be supporting your local DIY art scene if you like her stuff..

The scarves are hand painted by her friend Wendy who will be selling her wares there as well..and also has stuff for sale come by Bowery and support the Anti-Slam and Craftermath or you will get lost in Kmart in the diaper ad cat litter aisle for all of eternity!

Thursday, December 16, 2010

WFMU show shit.

Here are a few pics from tuesday nights live gig on WFMU. The guys there were really nice..I like playing on the radio,it's kinda like just being at home and playing but John and I can't yell at each other about our mistakes and i can't curse like a sailor. Just why do sailor's curse so much anyway? They get to ride in boats and wear those sassy little hats. Just what the FUCK is their problem?

Anybleep, I want to have a contest concerning which rat is the LARGEST and MOST AWESOME rat in NYC. I have one photo so far of a really fucking huge rat I took last night..That thing was practically as big as my dumb cat Delgado and had completely no fear of me. I was just standing right next to it taking its photo..It seemed quite flattered actually and was almost posing. Show off. I will post the rat pic as soon as I find a few more to compete with it. Feel free to send me pics of huge rats-I will post them on here.

Here is a link to East River playing live on WFMU..just click on the Dec 14th mp3 or the pop-up link. They took some video which will be in the archives soon I think.

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Just some unrelated pics and ramblings..

Hello friends, strangers, and enemies alike! I plan to be blogging a lot more now..just rambling on in that ever so charming way I have.So many people encourage me to write about my life..the weird shit like squatting and hopping trains and hitchhiking alone..playing music and just everything i've seen and done. The problem is, how do you write about your friends and not be exploitive? I would ask every person I wrote about permission to write about them-even the ones I don't like. My life does not seem strange to me because, well, it's MY life! I do have a lot of fun stories and have a half assed bunch of stories written down but I dunno..Norton Publishers says I should just make my blog into a big book but who would really want to read it? Norton could never publish my potty mouthed tales of drugs, drinking, etc..And all the people's pics I have up..not to mention the embarrassing brunch with the PARENTAL UNITS monthly posts..Ugh! I will have to think about organizing shit I have written..and organizing my brain. And hiring someone to edit the SHIT outta my poor grammar and use of adverbs. Dammit.

We shall see..I went to college to learn how to write and I have this blog-that's about it. But I love this damn blog. So cathartic. I don't even care if anyone reads it.

Anyhooch, these are some fun photos! First, there is Moby playing keyboard while a cute chihuahua dances along..I love Moby's new band Diamondsnake. Their videos on youtube are hysterical. Plus, he's a super nice guy. And he likes old music. The Mangina joins in there whom I love. He is a great painter and will be doing a pet portrait of Delgado soon. He charges not very much for what you get in return.. and is very talented..Check out Patrick Bucklew on Facebook to see his work.

Then we have some pics of the tile wall from the Society of Illustrator's museum that's uptown. That place is pretty cool..and I love these painted tiles. The pics don't capture how grand they are in person. My band will be playing March 26th there I think..for a big Crumb gallery opening..we may have possible VERY special guests sitting in with us. Have to see about that in the next few months..

Then to top it off..some Mars Bar art..painted torsos on the wall. I will be documenting a lot of Mars fun stuff as they get closer to their demise..Life ain't fair I tells ya!

Monday, December 13, 2010

Hear East River String Band live on WFMU tomorrow!

My band will be playing live on WFMU tomorrow night, tuesday December 14th.
Here is the info:

Antique Phonograph Music Program with

Michael "


Cumella on


broadcasting at 91.1 fm in New York, at 90.1 fm in the Hudson Valley from 8PM - 9PM.

It's a call in show so feel free to call in and ask John why he is farting so much and be sure to mention how great I am!
Why is this font so big?

Anyway..I gotta cold but it's going away..I've been drinking tea past few days but will have some new blogs coming this week..And I have some Mars Bar time to make up for since i've not been a boozehound the past week..

Sunday, December 12, 2010

Some Buckdancing at Jalopy and Matt Kinman playing.

I am really behind on this blogging stuff..I suppose that's why I will never win Best Drunken Blogger, or Most Offensive Post when they hand out awards..Well, I still have my "World's Best Granny" mug at least..So, things have been good lately..though the WSJ outed my age and over usage of my cell phone..we play live on WFMU from 8pm-9pm this tuesday so I am trying to not get sick and get my voice back. It got lost somewhere between getting wasted at Bowery Poetry Club, and then getting blacked out at Mars Bar upon hearing the news of their impending doom. Is it pathetic how depressed I am over this news? What will take the place of Mars Bar? All other bars annoy me.

Anyfelch, here are some videos of some amazing buckdancing at Jalopy Theater from last week..Thomas Maupin is 72 years old! The film about him, "Let Your Feet do the Talkin'" is really good..It's put out by Dust to Digital. The very talented Matt Kinman plays for them..

Tuesday, December 7, 2010

East River String Band in Wall Street journal today!

A freelance reporter wrote an article about my band and John's new 3 CD boxed set on Dust to Digital complete with photos and all, that appeared in today's Wall St Journal..Kinda strange paper to be in..but it's a nice article especially when it says I'm on my phone too much! Har!
Here is a link to it and a few pics of John's CD release party at Jalopy Theater..My next post will be the amazing buck dancers that were there!

Here is the link to today's, December 7th article about Baby, How Can it Be? and our upcoming CD Be Kind to a Man When He's Down.

Sunday, December 5, 2010

Mr. Lower East Side Pageant Shit.

So here is some video footage from the Mr. Lower East Side Pageant that went on at Bowery Poetry Club a few days ago..There is a pic someone sent me of me on the stage..There was no where to sit so they let people on stage to judge the show. Which I did, fairly I must say..No dangling chads here..but I saw enough things dangling there pretty much right in my last me a lifetime. Can one die from scrotum over load?

Included are a few videos from the show..I missed a lot of the good stuff..the swimsuit competition, got really smoky up there and beer was all over the place..I didn't want my camera to get ruined so I put it away. Unlike the men with their junk hanging out! Moonshine took first place..his third time winning the crown I believe..

Thursday, December 2, 2010

Playing at Jalopy Theater tonight! Show at 8pm. $15

East River String Band will be playing at Jalopy Theater tonight, December 2nd, to celebrate the release of John's 3CD boxed set from his 78rpm collection called Baby, How Can it Be?
There will be other performers as well as films shown and the boxed set will be for available there for sale..It's put out by Dust to Digital.

Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Mr. Lower East Side Pageant Wednesday! 10pm!

Tomorrow, Wednesday, is the annual crazy Mr. Lower East Side Pageant at the Bowery Poetry Club hosted by Reverend Jen. at 10pm! Come and see men compete for the glorious title..There is a talent section, a swimsuit and evening wear one just like the crappy one you see on TV..BUT these people are all funny and insane in a great way and it should be fun..So come out though it's gonna rain and shit..Just by being there, you become a judge! It's only $5 you cheap bastards! Just kiddin' know I love you a strictly platonic way. When I am drunk.

Saturday, November 27, 2010

Another Biggest TV ever dumped and someone loses their religion.

Hello Dorks! Here are some weird pics to astound you or put you to sleep. I am very upset by how cold it is already and how my cool winter jacket was stolen. Now I have to search for one just as awesome or the fashion police will write about me and TMZ will make fun of me. Like last time this happened..Oh wait, that was Paris Hilton not me. Eh, whatever.

We have a religious statue that someone threw out..I think it's creepy how it's facing the wall. Like the Blair Witch Project or something. Then, right where the OTHER huge TV was thown out that I blogged about months ago..ANOTHER TV like thing was dumped! How many do they have? Is it even a TV? Or a time machine or a black hole which nature abhors? I love east 9th st. Weirdest block ever.

Then, a now prized possession of mine..A signed print of my album where R. Crumb apologizes for the eating disorder he thinks he gave me. I told him I had it long before I met him but he won't believe me.

Next blog will be all about a big show we have on December 2nd at Jalopy Theater to celebrate the release of John's 3 Cd Boxed Dust-to-Digital set, Baby How Can it Be? which I promoted a few days ago. It'll be available for sale at Jalopy and is on Amazon right now. The discs are freakin' amazing and if you don't buy it you have mental issues. We will be accompanied by Pat Conte and Ernesto Gomez that night who are incredible.

Sunday, November 21, 2010

JOhn's Dust-to-Digital Comp is out now!!!

So, John has this 3 cd disc comp out NOW of 78's from his amazing collection! This is the shiznit and makes a great xmas gift or if you're a jew you can get one for days on end..3 CD's of amazing old time music!!!! You will rue the day you were born if you don't buy this shit.
Here is a promo video for it..John made me be in it looking fat and hungover..which is how I feel today. Because last night was insane and I went to bed at like 7am..then had a bunch of shit to do.
AnySlur, here is the promo video and I will also provide links to the Amazon website. It's a mix of love songs, lust songs, and songs of contmpt.. Dust-To-Digital have won Grammy's for their reissues in the past..Help make this one a winner so I can go to the Grammy's and punch celebrities when I'm drunk on the free booze. I beg of you.

Here's the Amazon link:

Friday, November 19, 2010

Just read whatever I write and keep quiet.

This week has been quite entertaining as far as weeks go..then again I am easily entertained like when I watch that freaking Yule log for hours upon hours giggling like a madwoman. Shall ye NEVER burn Yule log? It's a Christmas miracle! And no, they don't run it on a loop so shut the hell up!

Okay, maybe I had some wine tonight but I needed it cause everything is so nuts lately..Everyone I know has decided to have mental breakdowns at the same time or something..and death is all around me which makes me want to enjoy my own life more and just be around good people I honestly care about.

AnyTaint, here are some pics for you, constant readers and stalkers alike. We have some Mars Bar fun, Crazy Dave and I, my friend Mike and me, Jerry and I actually getting along..Biker Bill with his new hat by Ray's, someone got a Mars bar tat, someone had someone take a pic of their butthole...and a MYSTERY box! Who knows what's in that package! If you see something, say something or the terrorists have won...a slap-chop! Why should cooking be made easy for them?